Return of the King (of Coincidence)

So running into a go-go dancer in a go-go bar isn't exactly the most astounding thing that could happen to a guy. Hell if you went to a go-go bar and didn't run into a go-go dancer you'd probably have a fair complaint with management. But let me explain.

So earlier tonight I ducked out of work to stop in at the sophomore youth meeting for church. (Bear with me here, all my stories start slow...some of them even end that way.) I leave there a little after eight and stop by my mom's for a bit to see the kids. A little after nine I'm out of there as well. I'm actually home pretty early this means. I knew tonight would be my first totally free night in awhile so I was hoping to hear from an "old friend". When I didn't I was actually disappointed. It's been awhile after all and I actually have a lot to talk about for once. When ten comes and I haven't heard a word I assume I'm shit out of luck. But I'm flush with cash, extremely bored, not remotely tired and I have a lot of fresh dry cleaning. Fuck it, I'm going out.

As protocol dictates I can't go anywhere my "old friend" might be. Not good for business when customers cross paths. I haven't been out in nearly a month, so I head over to this place I go with the guys on occasion. Last time I was there was the Friday in Weekend of The Gods. I know she never works there. She's actually been turned down by that place several times. No idea why. But I figure there's zero chance of me interrupting her there. So I walk in the door and who is the first fucking person I see?

Yeah. You guessed it.

She's standing there next to the DJ booth looking more amazing than I've ever seen her look before. I normally don't even notice how cute she is, but at first I don't even realize it's her. I look away for a second and then look back before the look of surprise on her face translates into a look of surprise on my face.

Fuck.

So for a minute I go totally guinea and bust out with in a Jersey accent I've never had, "What the fuck are you doing here?" As if I had any right to know or even ask. We're both laughing now and she tells me she's trying out again. The manager is on his way over so she quickly shoos me away. I'd be insulted but I'm still sort of in shock.

So I sit down for a minute and before I've even taken my jacket off I've had three drinks. Two drinks later she meets me outside the bathroom, she doesn't seem like she's in a great mood. We chat for a minute. Later I hear from one of the managers that they hired her. Good for her.

I head back to the bar by myself. Pound back another two drinks before there's someone sitting next to me, asking if I'm Chris. Shit, I've been made. I now have some company for the next two drinks. I'm now also rapidly approaching wobbly.

So her friend (who apparently has been appointed my babysitter for the next little while) is occupied with business for a minute and I've had entirely too much to drink in entirely too short of a period of time. I won't say I was totally knackered but I'll say I was getting there. I cut myself off. I need something to do until I can drive. Lo and behold there's the girl I met last time I was in this bar...the one I made cry. Remember that story? The sudden recollection that I'm a pretty decent guy causes me to avoid her altogether and somehow I end up sitting upstairs and pretending to smoke a hookah with a pretty little thing who is studying art and wants to be a painter. I'm so tired I barely remember my name, nevermind hers.. An hour later I'm sobering and I think I just bought a painting. Not really sure. Going to have to look into that.

I head out just shy of two in the morning. I'm starving, confused, and have had too much to drink. That means I'm eating. The more I drink the more I eat it seems lately. I've been doing pretty good the past week or so, but tonight I end up at a fast food joint for the first time in a bit and order more food than I reckon I've ever seen. Haven't had chili in awhile so I order chili on everything. Literally everything. (Does that come with chili? Yeah? I'll take two.)

Fuck.

I get back to the office, flop into my chair and begin to wonder what the fuck exactly happened tonight. I know I'm not going to be able to work out when I get home tonight. I'll be lucky if I can make it to my bed without collapsing.

And all this food...goddamit all this food. Totally not supposed to be eating any of it.

The good news?

After six months of abstaining even the sight of chili makes my stomach rumble and my asshole burn, so instead of being eaten nearly all of the shit I bought went straight in the garbage totally untouched. A minor victory on a majorly weird night.

So yeah, I'm still unsure why tonight turned out exactly like it did. Certainly not sure of how. But I do know I've got somewhere to be tomorrow night now, and know that I have a whole lot of explaning to do.

God I love my life sometimes.

Right now however? Not so much.

'night all.